Daydream, delusion, limousine, eyelash / Oh baby with your pretty face / Drop a tear in my wineglass / Look at those big eyes / See what you mean to me / Sweet-cakes and milkshakes / I'm delusion angel / I'm fantasy parade / I want you to know what I think / Don't want you to guess anymore / You have no idea where I came from / We have no idea where we're going / Latched in life / Like branches in a river/ Flowing downstream / Caught in the current / I'll carry you / You'll carry me / That's how it could be / Don't you know me? / Don't you know me by now?

There's nothing left inside me anymore. Nothing left to feel, right now. I am scraped out, scratched out, leaking empty.

"So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day."

i can't even write anything of my own. nothing. i miss you. everything inside me aches. and the absence of words, and feeling, little vibrations in the air slice away. and you can play your video-games & your guitar & you can feel better. i'll do my thing. i'll sit in the dark, against the radiator & cry, until its numb and nothing can touch me.
feeling anything, even admitting to that, it is better than feeling nothing,. right?
((perhaps you think i can't remember. i remember what you said, what you said that mattered. and i wondered if you meant it. & i hope, and hope))

Feeling: emptied out
Listening to: the inflections and intonation in noah's voice. in my head.
Pretending: that if this is it, i'll be fine.

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