I can see Margot. She is your archetypal 'beautiful person'. You know, the kind that everyone is jealous of. Because she's not stupid, and she's not a bitch. Which makes her even more annoying, because she is (almost) perfect. Well, I think so. She's got a really slight build, and really fine blonde hair. And her eyes are this shade of grey that sometimes looks like purple. Sometimes, she wishes that she had different coloured eyes. She's sitting in this white dress. Margot is incredibly annoying in that, if the dress were worn by anyone else, it would invetibly get dirty and they would end up looking a state, not so with Margot. And also, as usually happens with the 'almost-perfect' types, she's completely oblivious to all this. Grrr...which pisses everyone off. Then they feel guilty because you know, she hasn't done anything wrong.
They're sitting in 'The Stones'. It's this little memorial garden the school built to commemorate dead teachers. It's (highly imaginative) name is derived from the fact it's covered in. Stones. Heh. Anyway. There's all this wooden decking, where Margot is sitting, and there are a few 'Blossom' Trees dotted around. These are trees of indeterminate erm, well you can't say breed...what is it? Indeterminate 'species'...well it sounds better than breed...But, every spring, they burst into masses of pink petals. And then, they fall. A pink sea.
And next to Margot, over there, is Iris. They both sit, with their feet hanging over the edge of the decking, paddling in the pink sea.
Iris envies Margot. She loves her, but she also envies her. She envies the way she moves. Effortlessly, whereas Iris always feel so heavy, so clumsy. So, out of place and uncomfortable. Iris always feels so huge compared to Margot, who is so slight.Ungainly. That's it. She is intelligent. Iris, I mean. Well so is Margot, but Iris remarkably so. But she doesn't believe it. She doesn't trust people as easily as Margot does, she can't be as open as she seems to think they expect her to be. She also envies the way Margot always looks so...'finished'. So..gorgeous all the time. Because she does. Iris isn't un-pretty. She is 'alright'...a quote from someone she barely knows. But she isn't as polished as Margot is, she's a bit rawer, a more un finished, not 'glossed-over'. She goes for darker clothes, deep colours, they're more emotive apparently, than insipid pastels and such like.
Margot:Do you miss him?
Iris:(Pause)...I don't know about that.Yeah, no I do.
Margot: Really?
Iris:I don't know. More like I just miss having someone...Laughs..How clich�d does that sound?
Margot:Laughs
Iris:But I never did know if he meant any of it...Do you remember...Ages ago, when I kept wittering on about being 'a temporary distraction'?It was quite a while ago actually
Margot:Er..Yees. Well I remember lots of wittering. Ooh yes, and I remember..Ha-ha..I am your witteree.
Margot, who is eating ice cream, puts down the tub, and stands up. Clicks her heels and gives a mock salute.
Margot:Aha, yes...Yes Sir! Feel free to witter to your heart's content, I am at your service.
Iris:LaughsYou'll wish you hadn't said that, I won't stop now....How am I supposed to tell? Tell whether he means it or not.
Margot:He's started again?
Iris:Yeah...well..no, he has, it's just...gah! Oh, I feel like One: He shouldn't like me. Like I'm not worth him paying attention to...if you know what I mean. Two: It's all just a superficiality..It.Won't.Last...and Three:...Um...Oh, you know I just thought of the best word to describe Reason Number Two: Fickle. Fickleness. That. Anyway, number Three: That I'm getting myself into a bigger mess than before and the way I can't help it.
I have people telling me that it's a great thing, others telling me he doesn't mean it. Others saying I just a dumbass. Hey, that's true, but you know. I like to give myself some credit. In fact, someone said he was the only one who made me happy anymore. I beginning to wonder if it isn't true.
That worries me
Feeling:
Listening to:
Pretending: